Enlarge your house; build an extension. Spread out your home, and spare no expense! For you will soon be bursting at the seams. Your descendants will occupy other nations and resettle the ruined cities. Fear not; you will no longer live in shame. Don’t be afraid…
Isaiah 54:2-4a NLT
Recently I have been waking feeling anxious. Life feels like a tsunami wave about to engulf me plus everyone and everything I hold precious. I lie awake experiencing this anxiety mentally and physically, yet I refuse to respond. I call out to God and acknowledge how I feel and I declare my confidence in God. The fears don’t subside, but I hold my ground. Historically I’d have collapsed under the pressure, become overwhelmed by self-pity and expressed my emotions in verbal or physical anger. Now I wait until I can discern God and know that I shall endure, even though the feelings of panic may survive for a while.
In such times I refuse to think badly of myself. I recall how I am loved by God and safe with him. I tell Jayne at an appropriate moment and with no expectation of rescue, but to inform and acknowledge where I am. It’s no secret of which I’m ashamed. Finally, I accept change is a part of life’s process I’m caught up in, yet I’m safe in God. I’ve grown in appreciation of and surrender to God. I’m much better placed today.
We are intended to grow as we age. Not simply physical ageing but to develop in who we have been created to become. If you find you circle back to familiar behaviours under pressure, then it’s time to take stock and begin to build towards a bigger version of yourself. A version that has been stretched by God and filled with a greater abundance of grace.
What problems and tough times in the past has God helped you to get through?
Thank you that in good times and bad, when life is smooth or in a crisis I can invite you to hold me close and protect me. May I grow in my resilience and learn from past adversity.